Matters of the heart

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AUNT PAULINE answers all questions to do with marriage, culture and life. Drop your questions online thezambiasun.com or whatsapp 0963867719 or email editor@thezambiansun.com

Dear Aunt,

How are you aunt, is it normal for a 42 year old man to have a small manhood like that of an 11 year old boy?

ANSWER: Men are made differently endowed. It is not the size that you should worry about but how effectively you use what God has blessed you with. Be content with what you have because you can not change it. You can only learn how to use it effectively.

Hi aunt, am worried every time I set my eyes on my partner or just talking on the phone I get aroused. Is it normal or maybe ananidyesa?  

ANSWER: You should be glad that you have feelings for your partner. Keep the fire burning. It is indeed a blessing also.

My wife is so violent in the house. She breaks things every time we have an argument. Please help me, what should I do as I do not want to divorce her.

ANSWER: Violence is not good in any form. You better get help for your wife. That anger must be leashed. She might change from breaking plates and pots to breaking you. You should see a pastor or church elders to talk to her. Even family members can also come and do some counselling.

My husband has got a habit of undressing in front of our children whenever he gets drunk. I have tried to talk to him but has not changed.

ANSWER: That is pure evil and satanic. A man or woman undressing before their children is bad. It Is not in our  culture and it is unchristian. There is no justification for that such conduct. What does he want to show the children. These are the people that end up defiling their children. He is obviously getting some excitement from being seen naked by the children. If he didn’t, he would have stopped. If he persists, report him to police. This is so wrong and must be stopped.

My fiancé beats me up and insults me in public most the times especially when we fight and we are supposed to marry in October this year. Should I cancel the marriage? He no longer makes me comfortable.ANSWER: God has shown you the way, it is upto you whether you see the light or not. The man is attacking you before you man and you are even contemplating marriage. He will kill you. It will be too late to says sembe, sembe. Sembe will not benefit you when you are dead. Get rid of that abusive boyfriend and do not marry. Violence is not an expression of love. It is bad for you and should not stay in an abusive relationship. Do not be desperate

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