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Life’s lessons

Life’s lessons:

“I met Sylvester Mumba in 2012 when I went on vacation in Africa. Sylvester used to sell things made out of wood at a park. He was a talented woodcarver. He used to make nice looking decorative crafts out of wood.🥰

I got his phone number after I asked him to make a wooden map of United States Of America with my names written on it. From that day, he became my friend and we started communicating even when I came back to USA.

I was 23 years old and single when I met him. I just did not feel happy. I was basically lonely and I would call Sylvester whenever I felt lonely. We would chat for hours non stop. He had broken english but I understood everything.

He used to tell me that we were meant to be because only I understood his bad english. We then started dating six months later. I started saving enough money working as a Host in at a SteakHouse. I went to a travel agency booked a plane ticket and was off again to Africa.

But this time not to see the Victoria falls but to see Sylvester. The ticket was $1,357 dollars at the time round trip. I stayed in Zambia for a month and we quickly got married. Then after the wedding, i left him in Zambia and flew back to USA.

Back home in USA, I paid an Immigration lawyer to help me with visa paper work for Sylvester. To make the long story short, Sylvester was finally given a green card and that’s how he came to USA in May. We did another wedding in USA. We were so Much in love.

All was well in our marriage. I even helped him get a Job at Target Store and helped him buy a car to ease his movements. He slowly started adapting to the American culture and his English Improved. He also met some Zambians living in USA and together they became one family.

We started attending functions organised by the Zambians in USA. I was even there in Florida to support Zambia National Soccer Team when they took on Japan. And after the match there was a party where we interacted with the Soccer players and other people.

I have attended many independence functions organised by the Zambian community in Atlanta. I started noticing one thing, the Zambians in USA like Gossiping and do not like to see their fellow Zambians (Friends) prosper in Life.

Sylvester’s Zambian friends, Women inclusive would call and tell me that Sylvester did not marry me because he loved me, but because of poverty and papers. They would tell me that he was going round the Zambian community telling people that he was just using me to become a citizen

They told me that he will leave me once he is given a green card valid for 10-years. Some of his Male Friends would call me asking me to divorce him and marry them instead, and some would call asking me for sex. I did not care about what people were telling me.

I loved him so much and he meant my world to me. Up todate I do not understand why some Africans in diaspora are jealous of each other. My step sister is married to a Nigerian man and the Nigerians are so supportive of each other.

Sylvester and I then decided to isolate ourselves from all the Zambians in USA because their gossip had started affecting our marriage. We were happy once again until in June this year when Sylvester was arrested for being in possession of drugs.

That day, he had gone drinking with some of his trusted Zambian friends. After around midnight, they all decided to call it a day. Sylvester was the only one driving so he had to drop his friends at their various homes.

And after dropping his friends on his way back home, he was stopped by a police patrol car. His friends had planted some drugs in his car and called the police. And that’s how he was arrested in June and was deported back to Zambia Three weeks ago.

I tried to fight his deportation for 4 months but it couldn’t work out as you know our immigration laws are tough. People get deported for minor offences. And the sad part is that his friends were asking me to date them since the time he was detained.

My husband Sylvester was deported back to Africa and 3 weeks later on Friday 24th November he sadly committed suicide. Sylvester was laid to rest on 27th of November 2018 at his parent’s village in Northern part of Zambia. I Was left so heartbroken upto now. 💔😭”




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