Matters of the heart


AUNT PAULINE answers all questions to do with marriage, culture and life. Drop your questions online or whatsapp 0963867719 or email

Dear Aunt,

Am a 35 year old man married with 3 kids, my problem is that whenever I try to have sex outside marriage there is no erection with my manhood but when I go to my wife my manhood stands perfectly. Please advise.

ANSWER: Why do you want to stray? You should be ashamed of yourself. I am sure it is your guilty conscience that causes all malfunction. I advise that you pray and repent for your sinful thoughts and actions.

Am a 20 year old lady dating a 48 year old man with 3 children from his first marriage. He separated from his wife 4 years ago and he is planning to marry me. Is it normal for a 20 year to marry a 48 year old man?

ANSWER: Write back when he marries you. I doubt there will be a marriage any time soon. The man is still married and not divorced. Separation is not divorce. It is possible the couple may get back together. Where will you be then? I suggest that you find a free man to marry you. Age does not matter. You can marry for love and not for age. Compatibility is a strange  thing. The important thing is that you should be in love with each other. But find a free man please. Leave the married man alone.

My prophet on Sunday told me on Sunday that I should quit my job because my boss is sitting on my progress. My job is my only source of income I have and I can’t afford to lose it. Is quitting a good idea? Please help.

ANSWER: The man of God should seek counselling for misleading  you. Do not quit your job. Who will look after you if you quit your job. Is the Prophet going to maintain your lifestyle until you find another job. And what is wrong with your job anyway?

My husband threatens to kill me every time we pick a fight. He also tells me that he has got two pistols which am not even aware of. I have taken him counselling three times but cannot change, what do I do?

ANSWER: Danger, danger. I see danger here. You can not stay with a person that daily threatens to kill you. He will do it one day. Better stay clear of that person. I suspect that even the smallest disagreement can set him off. My advise is that you report to police and family members. He needs a reality check. Death threats should never be taken lightly. Spousal kills are too many in this country. Lets learn to see red flags and respect them. If he persists, please leave him. Save your self from this maniac. Life is more precious than marriage. Never ignore such threats. It may be too late to talk or think about this.

NB: Please text your concerns. Do not call at awkward hours such as after 23:00 hours.


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